A fond farewell

 

Over the last four years, I’ve spent a lot of time in the magazine lab at Ryerson University’s School of Journalism. That’s because I’ve been the instructor on five issues of the Ryerson Review of Journalism (Summer 2008, Spring 2009, Spring 2010, Winter 2011 and Winter 2012). The job is an unbelievable time suck, there are moments of ridiculous stress and the pay is an insult, but each issue has also been an incredibly fulfilling experience. I’m always really proud of what my fabulous students accomplish and it’s a genuine pleasure to watch them grow as journalists, as leaders and — I hope this doesn’t sound too mawkish — even as people. Right before my eyes. I’m also often awed by how smart and talented they are and I just hope they remember me when they run the world (or at least run the world’s news outlets).

So I’ve done five issues now (the only people who have survived more are or were full-time faculty members) and I know I can’t do the Winter 2013 issue because of my upcoming stint as writer-in-residence at Berton House in Dawson City, Yukon. Never say never, of course, and Haley Cullingham, the editor of the new issue, was recently on Twitter taking bets that I would return because, she claims, I take a certain “masochistic pleasure” from the experience. But I figure this is my last issue. And I’m delighted to be going out on such a strong one.

Thanks to everyone I’ve worked with over years, especially the five super talented editors who managed to put up with me: Canice Leung, Marit Mitchell, Katherine Laidlaw, Liam Casey and Haley Cullingham. It’s been a fun ride and, really, a guy can’t ask for anything more than that.

 

 

Vengeance is Ford’s

My old friend @cityslikr runs a great blog called All Fired Up in the Big Smoke, which is all about Toronto politics. He claims he will buy me two drinks for every guest post I write and you can read my latest offering here. It’s about Mayor Rob Ford and the triumph of vengeance over vision. I also mention my great-great-grandfather, who built a mansion on Jarvis St. in 1875. (No, I never met him.)

Update: Sol Chrom has already responded to my post. He ain’t buying my long-term optimism and cites several good examples of destructive leaders who were followed by managers, not visionaries.

If Toronto’s Mayors Were Maple Leafs

Last September, during the municipal election, Shawn Micallef wrote a perspicacious open letter to George Smitherman in Eye Weekly (now known as The Grid). Micallef urged the Toronto mayoral candidate to be more like Wendel Clark and less like Tie Domi. Although I am not a Maple Leaf fan, I’ve watched the team for decades and inevitably started wondering what Leafs our former mayors most resemble. So I wrote a guest post for the All Fired Up in the Big Smoke blog. Now that I’ve seen [seen enough, surely — ed.] Rob Ford in action, I’ve updated the list:

* David Crombie = Ted Kennedy

Okay, I never saw Kennedy play—I’m not that old—but many hockey historians consider him the greatest Leaf ever. Captain for eight years, “Teeder” helped the team win the Stanley Cup five times and was the last Leaf to win the Hart Memorial Trophy as the league’s most valuable player. Mayor from 1972 to 1978, Crombie led a reform council that left a legacy the city has coasted on for decades. We still remember him fondly as Toronto’s Tiny Perfect Mayor.

 

* John Sewell = Frank Mahovlich

A big, supremely talented player, the Big M helped the Leafs win the Stanley Cup four times. And yet, management mistreated him and fans booed him. Sewell had been a smart and scrappy activist alderman, but after he had the temerity to suggest Toronto cops were anything less than tops, he lasted just one term as a bike-riding, rights-defending mayor. Pearls before swine, I guess.

 

 

 

 

 

* Art Eggleton = Inge Hammerstrom

An ineffectual player, Hammerstrom could, according to owner Harold Ballard, “go into the corners with eggs in his pockets and not break one of them.” Eggleton was equally ineffectual. Unfortunately, he lasted longer as mayor than the Swedish winger lasted as a Leaf—and a lot of things broke in Toronto while he was in office.

 

 

* June Rowlands = Tie Domi

A classic NHL goon, Domi served as Leaf enforcer. Rowlands ran for mayor on a law and order platform, but is best remembered for banning the Barenaked Ladies, an innocuous Scarborough pop group, from performing at Nathan Phillips Square. While both Domi and Rowlands were embarrassing, the big difference between the two was that Domi was, inexplicably, wildly popular in Toronto.

 

* Barbara Hall = Mats Sundin

The only Swedish player to score 500 NHL goals, the talented Sundin was a rare likable player on a team full of unlikable ones (Tie Domi, Darcy Tucker, Shayne Corson). Hall was mayor during Premier Mike Harris’s war on the city. Like Sundin, she served with class during a difficult era.

 

* Mel Lastman = Tiger Williams

A notorious bad boy, Williams remains the NHL’s all-time penalty leader. Some hockey fans thought he was a goof; others found him entertaining. Ditto for Lastman.

 

* David Miller = David Keon

When I was a kid, the hockey magazines I devoured regularly referred to the small, skillful Keon as “pound for pound the best player in the NHL.” Although he was one of the greatest players to ever don a Leaf sweater, his relationship with the team eventually soured and he split. As mayor, Miller had smarts, skill and vision—and was equally underappreciated. But many of the mayor’s supporters have a nagging suspicion that, like Keon, who won the Lady Byng Memorial Trophy as the league’s most gentlemanly player, the mayor would have been even more effective if he’d had Gordie Howe’s elbows.

 

 

 

 

 

 

* Rob Ford = Harold Ballard

Yes, I know as owner, Ballard never dressed for the Leafs, but as we’ve already started to discover, Rob Ford doesn’t do much either. Instead, his brother Doug is the player while Rob sits in his bunker and throws temper tantrums. Oh, and Pal Hal was a buffoon too.

 

Car Songs

Spacing magazine, which launches its first national edition tonight, is holding a road trip mix CD contest. Make a CD for Matthew Blackett’s cross-Canada drive and get a free subscription. Gotta like that.
To get you in the mood and give you some ideas, here’s the Car Song Appendix from my book Drive: A Road Trip through Our Complicated Affair with the Automobile. But please don’t steal too many of the songs from this list.

 

No matter what the audio system is, music rarely sounds better than when it’s cranked up during a road trip with friends. And automobiles never seem more full of promise—more essential—than in the lyrics of a good song about a beloved set of wheels, driving or the road. And there are a lot of them. I aimed to craft a killer playlist of car tunes, but that’s no easy task, especially since I wanted them all to fit on an eighty-minute CD, a limit that turned out to be quite painful. I ended up cutting a lot of tracks I didn’t want to lose. That caveat aside, here is an annotated version of my completely idiosyncratic playlist of the most indispensable car songs:

“Rocket 88”
Jackie Brenston & His Delta Cats (1951)
This may be the first rock ’n’ roll song. Even if it isn’t, it’s a classic about cars, boozing and cruising. (Ike Turner’s Kings of Rhythm actually made the recording, but since Brenston, normally the group’s saxophone player, did the singing, the band used the Delta Cats moniker.)

“No Particular Place to Go”
Chuck Berry (1964)
Although Berry, who worked on an auto-body assembly line, recorded several noteworthy car songs, including “Maybellene,” “No Money Down,” and “You Can’t Catch Me,” I’ve chosen this rocker about a guy and a girl “cruising and playing the radio.” They park but the girl has a “safety belt that wouldn’t budge.”

“Little Red Corvette”
Prince, 1999 (1983)
Sure, using a car as a metaphor for a woman is nothing new, but this funky pop song is Prince at his best.

“Low Rider”
War, Why Can’t We Be Friends? (1975)
This Latin rock take on lowrider culture is hard to resist.

“Little Deuce Coupe”
The Beach Boys, Surfer Girl (1963)
No car song playlist would be complete without the Beach Boys. Although the great American pop band has plenty of automobile-related material to choose from—“Fun, Fun, Fun” and “409” would also have been fine selections—I’ve chosen this hot rod ode because of the stunning vocal arrangement.

“Driving Sideways”
Aimee Mann, Bachelor No. 2 (2000)
A lovely song about travelling with a woman who won’t navigate because she’s afraid she’ll be wrong. A metaphor for a doomed relationship.

“Brand New Cadillac”
The Clash, London Calling (1979)
Although Vince Taylor wrote this song, the Clash recorded the definitive version. A great tune from what may be the greatest rock ’n’ roll album of all time, so of course it’s going to make this list.

“Roadrunner”
The Modern Lovers, The Modern Lovers (1976)
This infectious garage rock anthem is about avoiding loneliness by listening to the radio and driving fast in Massachusetts. “Radio on!”

“The Passenger”
Iggy Pop, Lust for Life (1977)
My playlist includes more songs from the 1970s than any other decade. Perhaps that’s because I was a teenager back then and not because the era was the high-water mark for car music. Still, this popular proto-punk song about cruising around at night, when the city is asleep and the stars are out and “everything looks good,” is an obvious choice.

“Autobahn”
Kraftwerk, Autobahn (1974)
An improbable hit on both sides of the Atlantic, this hypnotic bit of electronic pop—complete with cars zooming by, squealing tires and other road sounds—captures the exhilarating monotony of long-distance highway driving. The fact that most English-speaking listeners misheard the song’s oft-repeated line Fahren fahren fahren auf der Autobahn” as “Fun, fun, fun on the autobahn” only makes it better. (Fahren means driving in German.) There are various versions available, ranging from three minutes to nearly twenty-three minutes in length—I’ve chosen the nine-and-a-half minute one so this playlist will be burnable on a CD.

“Radar Love”
Golden Earring, Moontan (1973)
Widely considered the best driving song of all time—just try sticking to the speed limit while this song blasts from the car stereo. Just try.

“Crosstown Traffic”
Jimi Hendrix, Electric Ladyland (1968)
Cars as sexual metaphor again—this time from one of rock’s most revered guitarists. The narrator, who will only drive ninety miles an hour, compares a “hard to get through to” woman to heavy traffic because she is slowing him down.

“Old Blue Car”
Peter Case, Peter Case (1986)
Although it earned a Grammy Award nomination, this song from Case’s solo debut is perhaps the least known on this playlist. But everyone can relate to what it’s about: he and his friends pile into an old car that will take them anywhere they want to go.

“Long May You Run”
The Stills-Young Band, The Stills-Young Band (1976)
Today, Neil Young is a devoted car collector. But back in 1965 (not in 1962 as the song suggests) he had to abandon his beloved first car—an old hearse nicknamed Mort—after it broke down near Blind River, a small town in Northern Ontario. This is his elegy to Mort.

“Passenger Side”
Wilco, A.M. (1995)
A whimsical alt-country ballad about a driver who has lost his licence and must rely on his friends to drive him around. The wasted passenger doesn’t like riding shotgun—or that his equally wasted designated driver is swerving all over the road.

“Windfall”
Son Volt, Trace (1995)
The narrator of this alt-country anthem sure loves the road trip he’s on. I’m particularly fond of the part where he finds an all-night AM radio station from Louisiana that reminds him of 1963 and “sounds like heaven.”

“This Year”
The Mountain Goats, The Sunset Tree (2005)
This song is not about cars; it’s about a seventeen-year-old kid determined to survive one more year with his abusive stepfather. But I’ve included it here because songwriter John Darnielle does such a masterful job of using the car as a narrative vehicle. On Saturday morning, he finds freedom by getting in the car and driving away, fast. He gets drunk, plays video games and then meets his girlfriend (they are, he sings, “twin high maintenance machines.”) The car, stuck in second gear, screams as he turns into the driveway when he arrives home at dusk to face another inevitable ugly confrontation with his stepfather.

“(Looking for) The Heart of Saturday Night”
Tom Waits, The Heart of Saturday Night (1974)
I’m tempted to pick “Ol’ 55,” from Waits’s Closing Time album, but I ’m going with this tender, melancholic ballad about cruising around on a Saturday night in an Oldsmobile.

“Racing in the Streets”
Bruce Springsteen, Darkness on the Edge of Town (1978)
Given that The Boss grew up in New Jersey, it’s no surprise that cars make appearances in many of his songs, but this one from the last of his four great albums is my pick as the best of the genre. Springsteen often masks dark lyrics with rousing music, but this is no rocker; it’s a slow, seven-minute masterpiece and an unabashedly poignant portrayal of adult despair and what a car can really mean to someone. Springsteen’s working-class characters rarely see cars as simply freedom or adolescent salvation despite all their talk about promised lands: the man wooing the porch-bound Mary in “Thunder Road” knows any redemption from their loneliness that he and his car can offer will be only temporary and the cruising kids in “Born to Run” have nowhere to hide on the broken hero–jammed highways. But the narrator in “Racing in the Streets” is past even that; for him, the car represents survival. Unlike other men his age—most of whom have given up and started slowly dying—when he’s finished working at his dreary job he goes out and races his souped-up 1969 Chevy for money. His aging girlfriend wallows in her shattered dreams and even when he says he’ll drive her to the sea to wash away their sins, it’s hard to sense any optimism about it. His car and his ability to beat other drivers are all he has left.